Let me tell you (and myself) this, unfortunately you are not what you think you are. Human mind, when gets to self, works in complicated and bizarre ways to interpret your feelings, intentions and personality. it is actually really challenging to find a perception of self that is even close to reality. It needs effort and awareness.
One thing I recently found helpful to have a better self-perception is to look at your actions, not your thoughts, and try to find those actions or similar ones in other people around you and then see what you think about them. Actions independent from thoughts and intentions are not a precise indicative of self either but it will help you (at least it is helping me) understand how far from reality you are.
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